So, it's been a bit over two whole years since I last came to this wondrous thing called 'LiveJournal'... and it's strange really. I've realized how easy is it to become disconnected to oneself and to others around you. It's a sad and dismal conslusion, though one I've come to accept as a sign that yes, indeed I have changed. And change, ladies and gents, is a very good thing. For without this notion, we would be unable to transform into the people we've strived to become. Our eyes would be wide open, but we'd be unable to see.
What's new you ask? Lot's and lot's of things!
It's been almost two years since I started working for the 'greater good'. I was laid off at my previous employer due to economic setbacks in mid Nov. 06' and spent two months in utter chaos, wondering how I was gonna pay my bills. And browsing through Craig's List I found (insert angelic choir here) PRPG! w00t! So now I'm making way more than I was and living a comfortable life. Not to mention I'm getting a 'hands-on' look at what my career will look like if I pursue my degree in psychology. And I don't like it one bit. So I think I'll stick to teaching instead.
October marked some bittersweet reminders.
The 1st was my best friend's birthday and we celebrated with some tequila. October 5th was my uncle's first year memorial. He passed away due to medical complications. In some ways, a very heavy burden was lifted from my family when he died, but at the same time an even larger gap was left behind. October 17th was G's birthday which we celebrated at Claim Jumpers. This same month marked the sixth year we've been together... and counting.
Last week, Thursday the 23rd to be exact, brought my cousin's 4th year memorial. It was so damn hot that day too, and traffic was uber congested while driving to the cemetary. I thought the flowers were gonna wilt in my car, but luckily they survived. So after cleaning her headstone and arranging some pebbles and shells I took, I lit the incense and let it's fragrance surround me with memories. I wanted to cry. I wanted to feel sad. But I didn't. Instead I just sat there in the warmth above me, surrounded by forgotten graves and quietly let time pass. When her sister arrived, we gossiped like old maids until the sun began to set. And when the bells at the clock tower rang six o'clock we called it a day and said our goodbyes. I've never felt so peace filled before when I've visited her grave.. it was almost ethereal. Could this mean I'm letting go? I don't know if my emotions are healed yet. Only time will tell I suppose.
But that's pretty much my current life in a nutshell. I hope to be updating this thing with more frequency. But procrastination seems to be my forte at the moment.
- Horray for Procrastination!